Uncertainty is Unproblematic

When life takes an unexpected turn, staying positive is the only way to turn uncertainty from eating away at you.  Most of the time, it is in our nature to try to control our environment as much as possible.  But controlling our jobs, our emotions and our daily routine is impossible to maintain.  There have been days lately where I have regretted not reading my horoscope that morning, as if knowing ahead of time that things were about to change would make it any easier to manage. 

An easy comparison I can draw is running in a race.  Let's say I had known the new route of the BMO Half-Marathon ahead of time, I would have been able to practice the hills that I felt significantly slowed me down, and I may have shaved a few minutes off my finish time.  Yet on the other hand, going into the race not knowing exactly where I was going or what kind of terrain lay ahead, I didn't have to dread the hills coming around the corner and know exactly how grueling they were going to be.

Planning is not my strong suit, but learning is.  Unfortunately, without proper planning skills, I tend to learn things the hard way.  It may not be the most efficient way to learn, but I certainly have not needed to be taught the same lesson twice. 

Surrounding myself with the people and things I love, such as running my beloved seawall, spending time with my amazing friends and my always-supportive family, I can recapture that same blissful and positive attitude that came so naturally when everything was going according to plan.  What I have learned in the past few weeks is that worrying and dreading uncertainty is far more painful than embracing it.

Status: Is Changing.

There are some things that aren’t fundamentally changing—Jersey Shore is still on air, people still watch the Superbowl just for the advertisements, McSteamy is still McSteamy, and as far as I can tell, The Bachelor hasn’t changed a bit. (Minus the quality of men playing the role of the Bachelor.)

But some cultural phenomena are changing, both rapidly and unpredictably. Online social networks and how they are being used are shifting every single day. The line between individual and corporation is blurring, as brands can blog and socialize with their customers 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. People self-brand by turning their hobbies into microenterprises online. Success can start from simply launching their homemade videos on YouTube channels, pouring their specialized knowledge or artwork onto blogs, or selling their goods on their websites. And the opposite is true for existing and successful companies and organizations, who can take on a grassroots aesthetic and viral marketing through Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.

As with all things in our world, what goes up must come down. Unfortunately, not everyone can reap the benefits of new technology—there has to be some collateral damage. Recently, companies like Rogers Video, HMV, and Blockbuster have suffered significant losses. The price of real estate in conjunction with online competitors has hastened the pace of storefront demise, and perhaps they can seek refuge in cyberspace. Personally, I am sad to see the stores go—renting a movie and buying a CD now and then were familiar pastimes that—though I partook in less and less frequently—I still miss today. Perhaps more so now because the option is no longer there, but no matter.

What I find particularly fascinating about current social media technologies is our ability as users to adapt to changes just as rapidly as they come. Take Facebook’s timeline, for example. The pseudo-mandatory conversion to a timeline profile had me instantly defensive and even angry. I didn’t like the look, the banner, the rearrangement of my profile, the substitution of “wall” with “timeline”, none of it. But I voluntarily converted just the other day and, as if my eyes had grown accustomed to poor lighting, I now see the timeline as normal and even more attractive than the previous layout that I had only weeks ago clung on to.

With such sophisticated, meticulous and constant analytical data software measuring each new app, social media platforms may feel pressured to change and “keep up” with the times, yet traditional media—though more proactive to new technologies and trends in the last five years—have held on to familiar formats, scheduling and content. Are online developers simply creating the very changes and trends they are trying to stay ahead of?

2012: Year of the Water Dragon

We haven’t seen the year of the Dragon in 12 years. Not since the new millennium, when the same sense of excitement, mystery and even fear rang through the Year 2000 discourse. The animals of the Chinese zodiac have personality traits that are said to influence not only the individuals born under the sign’s years, but the events that shape the year itself. The Dragon is stormy and intense, charismatic, and lucky. Quite an exciting combination, indeed.

Breaking into the first month of 2012, I sense the three traits already. The future is inspiring and full of options and it has a refreshing openness about it that replaced 2011’s anxiety and uncertainty. I’ve started a new job and feel exceptionally lucky. While my life is still not crystal-clear, I embrace the blurry path ahead with ambition and courage. Now that I’m finished school, I feel as though now is when the real learning begins. Making an effort to seek knowledge, grow and express myself creatively and professionally is all part of growing into this new sort of person—no longer a student, which claimed a good 50-70% of my identity prior to December—but a plain old, adult-fare-transit-paying person. But I will strive to be anything but plain. My intention is to avoid the mundane, to try new things and shed self-doubt.

2012 is evidently the year of the Water Dragon. Full of fluidity and fortune, these elements will help diffuse the tempestuous nature of ordinary dragon years. As a Snake, I am compatible with the Dragon (as are Rats), and as such am to find this year full of “personal happiness and professional success” which is basically an abstract of my Vision Board's narrative.

So not as to rely completely upon Chinese astrology, I humbly remind myself that it is I who am in control of not only achieving my goals but creating them. Goals must each have a solid blueprint; a map of steps to take that will bring the goal closer and closer to becoming realized. For example, my medium to long-term goal for 2012 is to go to New York City. What can I do today to make sure that this happens? I can work hard and nail down a solid job. In a month, I can start an automatic savings account to put away a certain percentage of my earnings. In the meantime, I can research, plan and book flights and accommodations. Et voila, suddenly the trip is happening. Staying on top of the small steps is the key to making sure that big things happen—and that’s all on us, no water dragon needed.

Growing Pains: From University to Reality

This year has truly changed me in more ways than the previous three preceding it have. As this final semester of my undergraduate career comes to an end, I am filled with contradicting feelings: excitement and anxiety, optimism and nostalgia. Moving to Vancouver was the ultimate game-changer because it has given me a taste of life after SFU. Distancing myself from the insulated bubble that is perched atop Burnaby Mountain gave me a reality check—or more accurately, a confirmation that one’s dreams can actually be realized.

Since I was old enough to remember Vancouver as a child, I knew that I wanted to live there—er, here. Now settled in a great old apartment building in the heart of East Vancouver, I could not be more content. I adore my neighborhood and smile every day because of how amazing it is.

But my happiness is riddled with underlying fear, for once my student loan dries up and my Family Bank closes its doors to me as part of the appropriate transition from “Needy Student” to "Needy adult", I must rely on myself from here on end.

It is a strange feeling to be released from the chains of academia, which on the one hand held me mentally hostage to a world of abstract theories and considering abstract questions about the universe, while on the other hand sheltered me from worrying about where I would be in five years, or two years, or the next summer...All that mattered was making it to the next deadline. That being said, all the while I would formulate plans and then re-plan and counter-plan my future career path, and within the context of “future” it was a lot easier to be bold and adventurous—and now it is not so easy.

The key, I know, is to not stop dreaming big, not to stop raising the bar of what is possible and what could be possible. I must remember that the only limits I have are the ones I place on myself. How else could there be so many inspiring people my age who are in the same exact position as I am, making their dreams come true? Any obstacle can be overcome; limitations are always perceived. I must, however, acknowledge my tremendous amount of luck since the hand I was dealt was indeed a rare one: Being born in Canada, having a Super-Mom and incredible supportive friends, and being able to see and take advantage of opportunities have all contributed to my position today.

And I am grateful for all that I have as often as I think of it. Whatever happens tomorrow, or after my last final exam, or a month thereafter, I know now that I will be ready to work hard and put my own dreams out of my head and onto a To-Do List.

Falling in Love with Florence

Florence + Machine have come a long way since The Dog Days. After 2009’s release of the debut album, Lungs, I was happily surprised by the playful lyrics and unique sound of the band. Florence Welch and her friend and former teen collaborator, Isabella “Machine” Summers (who has since left the band) have created a hybrid-genre of music that one can both dance to and connect with on an intimate level. While Lungs had impressed me with superb vocals that sent chills down my spine, her 2011 album, Ceremonials, has sold me on Florence + Machine for life.

One of the reasons running is so great—a subject I will return to, at a later time of productive procrastination—is the mental escape from our problems that it provides. The right music can elevate even the most casual jog into a blissful and uplifting experience. Ceremonials is powerful; it goes far beyond Lungs and takes listeners into Florence’s world. Songs like: Only if for a Night, Heartlines, Bedroom Hymns, No Light and Spectrum are energetic and deeply soulful, and put me in the right head space for a good challenge. I can (and have) ran to the entire album, and have never felt more in tune with myself. Combining F+M with running creates what I can only describe as a minor spiritual quest; I work through feelings I didn’t even know existed that her songs bring out with a physical release that washes away stress and feelings of incompetence and inadequacy.

Listening to music is a fantastic pastime for daily traveling and especially for commuting, precisely because of songs that have this ability to change how you see the world. F+M songs truly bring out the beauty and color in the everyday landscapes—and in any and all kinds of weather. The lyrics sound like written poetry, like the kind that a young girl writes in the middle of the night and then hides in a shoebox stowed under her bed. They are honest and pure—touching on emotions of love, forgiveness, sorrow and joy. Quite refreshing from the majority of popular music, which I admit takes up a generous proportion of my iTunes library.

Of all the songs on the Ceremonials album, Remain Nameless is by far my favorite. If you are a.) female and b.) have ever felt (unreciprocal) love for someone, this song will resonate with you. It is a story about a hopeless romantic, professing her infinite support and steady presence (“remaining the same”) for a troubled, fleeting and undeserving man. Written like a poem and sung like a hymn, the vulnerability expressed in this song is what makes it genuine and truly amazing.

<3 <3 <3 Florence + Machine <3 <3 <3